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Pete George

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I’m not very amused about an implication that the Rugby World Cup is rigged by match fixers.

I think the Al Blacks stand an excellent chance of winning on their merits as players campaign planners and players. I hope the games are decided on the field.
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October 24, 2015 10:05am
Kimbo

I’m not very amused about an implication that the Rugby World Cup is rigged by match fixers.

Come on, Pete. It’s a joke – and one that some Kiwis in 1995 and 2007, Saffers in 2011 and Scotties in 2015 used to console themselves.
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October 24, 2015 10:11am
Ross Miller

Heh Pete … lighten up. It’s topical, it’s funny and I for one see it for what it is.
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October 24, 2015 10:12am
Kimbo

How do you know if there is an Australian at a cock fight? He enters a duck

How do you know if there is a South African at a cock fight? He bets on the duck

How do you know if there is an Indian bookie at a cock fight? The duck wins

Joking aside though, I once heard a professional gambler interviewed, who said he would never bet on rugby as a matter of principle, as the outcome was determined too much by shades-of-grey refereeing decisions.
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October 24, 2015 10:16am
mikenmild

I think my favourite bit of the perjury trial so far has been Vettori’s story about the diamond. When Chris Cairns didn’t provide the diamond Vettori had paid for, he eventually gave him his money back – £9,000 in cash. Not dodgy at all, no…
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October 24, 2015 10:51am
calendar girl

Oh come on, PG, does the morning have to be that dreary in Dunedin ………. really?
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October 24, 2015 11:06am
Mobile Michael

Pinocchio, Snow White, and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day. As they walk, they come across a sign: “Beauty contest to find the most beautiful woman in the world..” “I am entering” said Snow White. After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, “Well, how’d ya do?” ” First Place ,” said Snow White
They continue walking and they see a sign: “Contest to find the strongest man in the world..” “I’m entering,” says Superman. After half an hour he returns and they ask him, “How did you make out?”” First Place ,” answers Superman. “Did you ever doubt it?”
They continue walking when they see a sign: “Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?” Pinocchio enters. After half an hour he returns with tears in his eyes…
“What happened?” they asked.
“Who the f–k is Chris Cairns?” asked Pinocchio.

(Allegedly)
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October 24, 2015 11:17am
mikenmild

Snow White comes home after a walk in the forest to a silent, bloody house. There is blood everywhere, and pieces of dwarfs litter the scene. Horrified, she hunts to see whether any have survived. She hears a muffled noise coming from the cellar. Moving closer to the cellar door she can make out a voice. It seems to be saying “Australia’s gonna win the World Cup.” “Oh Dopey,” she sighs, “I’m so glad you’re still alive”!
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October 24, 2015 11:30am
Mobile Michael

More you say?

A cricketer is drying the dishes for his wife. She passes a newly washed plate to him and it slops through his fingers, smashing on the floor and earning a tense look from his wife. Quickly clearing away the remains of the plate he returns for the next one, only for it to slip through his fingers again and smash on the floor.

“Admit it, you work for Chris Cairns! The trips to India, the cash you carry, the lipstick I found on your collar, you must be!” accused the wife.

The cricketer denies it, “No, I promise. The truth is I’m having an affair with a woman in India. The cash is for the hotels and I missed the lipstick.”

The wife breaks down, “Oh forgive me, I thought the worst.” They return to washing the dishes and she hands him another plate, only for it to slip through the fingers again and smash on the floor. And the wife says:

“You bastard, you are working for Chris Cairns.”
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October 24, 2015 11:30am
redqueen

@Kimbo

You mean like a bad call against Scotland at the last minute? 😉
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October 24, 2015 11:40am
Mr_Blobby

It must be so then.

Come on Pete man up an admit you got it wrong.
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October 24, 2015 12:44pm
thedavincimode

milky

Hopefully Inland Revenue is taking an interest in these proceedings.
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October 24, 2015 1:06pm
Longknives

Ha ha Pete is “Not Amused”!!
As an aside does anyone else find it remarkable that neither Vettori nor McCullum knew they had to report match fixing?? Despite both having been Professional Cricketers for many years..
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October 24, 2015 1:37pm
labrator

DPF please provide the address of this sign immediately to supply a takedown notice. The Minister for Humour has decreed it illegal.
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October 24, 2015 1:39pm
wf

@ Longknives:

There are none so blind as those who will not see.
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October 25, 2015 8:55am

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