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June 12, 2014 8:00am by Kokila Patel

General Debate 12 June 2014

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General Debate

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nasska

The pain of childbirth is grossly exaggerated Steve. 🙂
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June 12, 2014 8:37pm
Griff

The drill trick works and stops the ffn throbbing
another method is a red hot needle.
a canvas or sheep bale one is best.
big so it seers its way in.
I once accidentally ripped a big toe nail backwards .
Its grows back only on two edges took the middle growing bit of the nail bed right out of my toe.
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June 12, 2014 8:54pm
Johnboy

I once accidentally shot myself through the head with a 7mm back in 2008.

When I recovered I had this overwhelming urge to come to KB and comment! 🙂
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June 12, 2014 8:59pm
Pete George

International Newswire: The England team visited an orphanage in Brazil today.

“It’s heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope” said Jose, age 6.
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June 12, 2014 9:02pm
Johnboy

Nice one PG! 🙂

Have you considered standing as Conservative for Dunedin South/North/Anywhere? 🙂
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June 12, 2014 9:05pm
goldnkiwi

What happened to Dennis Horne, last time I read his name there was that plane crash. I have kept meaning to ask.
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June 12, 2014 9:05pm
Johnboy

Perhaps Dennis’s real name was Paul James Bennett goldi! 🙂
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June 12, 2014 9:12pm
Griff

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khkSXrQNtWQ
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June 12, 2014 9:19pm
ShawnLH

10 Reasons Atheists Make Me Laugh 🙂

1. Atheists are fighting against something they don’t believe exists. It’s like writing blogs against Caspar the Friendly Ghost or Bilbo Baggins. Why would you bother?

2. Atheists spend more time writing on Christian blogs than they do on their own. Why fuel a nonexistent fire?

3. Atheists love to act intellectual until you catch them doing something illogically and then they scream profanities cause that’s really intellectual.

4. Atheists have the word theist in their name. Every time they say who they are they call attention to God.

5. Atheists condemn all that’s wrong with Christianity and yet can not produce one work of art, literature or sacrificial deed done in the name of atheism. Even they realize it’s not worth dying for.

6. Atheists only believe in what their senses tell them unless its Darwin telling them things that happened billions of years ago, then they have more faith than a Catholic at First Communion.

7. Atheists believe in science unless the scientists believe in God, then they denounce the scientist and call him a moron.

8. Atheists believe in their fellow man, unless their fellow man believes in God, then they denounce their fellow man and call him a moron.

9. Atheists believe in the great free-thinkers of the past like Andrew Flew unless they change their mind and become theists then they denounce them and call them morons.

10. Atheists don’t believe in morons unless they are atheists and then they embrace them and call them intellectuals.

🙂 🙂 🙂
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June 12, 2014 9:19pm
Pete George

I wouldn’t stand for the Conservatives, fundamental differences.

About the only party I’d consider standing for is The Civilian Party but they haven’t registered yet and haven’t asked me yet, I’m good enough on ice creams but may not be up to scratch on satire.
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June 12, 2014 9:21pm
goldnkiwi

Or James James Morrison Morrison Witherby George Dupree?
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June 12, 2014 9:22pm
nasska

https://www.dropbox.com/s/0nke8aa9wjt7t0p/Atheist%2021.jpg
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June 12, 2014 9:26pm
Johnboy

I think you should approach Ben with a plan to move Wellington Airport even further south to Dunedin Pete.

That should get you over the satire requirement! 🙂
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June 12, 2014 9:27pm
Pete George

0/10 for me on that Shawn.

Here’s another view on the topic.

1. Please stop hedging when you mention our lack of belief. Atheists are atheists. We’re not “self-described,” nor do we “claim” to be atheists. You don’t want us to start saying things like, “This is my friend, Julie. She calls herself a Christian,” do you? Then man up, brace yourself, and use the a-word all by itself. Practice in front of the mirror if you need to. You’ll know you have the proper calm, factual tone when the glass doesn’t shatter.

2. Please stop capitalizing the word “atheist.” Unless it comes at the beginning of the sentence, you’re just wasting ink. We know you’re probably trying to be polite, but it doesn’t work that way. There is no guy named Athe.

3. Some of you keep insisting that we’re angry at your god. And then you laugh at us for being so silly – being angry at someone we don’t even believe in. Well, you’re right. That would be pretty darned silly. That’s why we don’t do it. Are you annoyed at Zeus? Do you have a grudge against the faerie folk? Of course not. It’s the same for us – how could we feel anger or hatred toward a non-existent being? (Some of his followers cheese us off, but that’s another story.)

4. Stop saying that deep down inside, we really do believe in your deity. Belief in the kind of guy who can create an entire universe with the force of a few well-turned phrases is not the sort of secret that fits neatly into a back pocket, as it were. If we thought this fellow was real, we’d be the first to know. And people don’t tend to keep that particular nugget of information to themselves. Ever notice that?

5. Please understand that “You’re such a nice person! I can’t believe you’re an atheist!” is not a compliment. More importantly, please understand that we understand that. Believe me, every single one of us has considered replying, “And you’re so smart – I can’t believe you’re a Christian!” How about we all agree to not go there?

6. The only thing all occupants of foxholes have in common is access to weapons and a willingness to fight. It might be the better part of wisdom not to provoke them by insisting that you know more about their beliefs or lack thereof than they do.

7. How can our lives have any purpose without God? One word: chocolate.

8. It’s sweet of you to worry about us, really it is. But it’s not terribly helpful to tell us that we should go ahead and believe in your particular faith “just in case.” Just in case what? In case a deity who can’t distinguish heartfelt faith from apple-polishing affectation happens to be running the show?

9. Let’s make a deal: we promise to stop asking that stupid question about whether God can make a rock so big he can’t lift it. In exchange, please stop saying, “Well, God doesn’t believe in atheists!” and then laughing like Shakespeare came back to life just long enough to write one last comedy.

10. Please quit asking us how or why we “turned our backs” on God. The whole point of being an atheist is that we don’t see any reason to think we did any such thing.

11. Anyone who was born in an English-speaking country and is more than two minutes old has heard about God and Jesus. It’s annoying when you assume that atheists just haven’t heard enough about them, and that’s why we’re still atheists. Many of us have done extensive research on the subject of religion. Many of us credit our atheism to exactly that.

12. Please stop telling your atheist acquaintances that you’ll miss us when you get to heaven. No, you won’t. If you turn out to be right, you’ll be in heaven – the place where, by definition, people don’t feel sad. And if we’re right – well, guess who won’t be feeling much of anything?

13. If you’ve ever said, “You can’t prove there isn’t a God” – first of all, congratulations. You’re officially four years old. Second, we never said we could. But until you can show some serious proof that there is one, we see no reason to believe. There’s nothing wrong with taking a leap of faith, provided you acknowledge that’s what you’re doing. Atheists simply prefer other forms of exercise.

14. Stop asking us how we can be moral without God. It’s simple. We’re awake, and we’re not idiots. That’s all it takes to figure out that sharing the planet with so many other people is a lot more pleasant when we also share some basic ideas about acceptable behavior. I don’t like being stabbed; therefore I support laws against stabbing and promise not to stab anyone myself, no matter how much I may feel like doing so. See how easy?

15. So far as being a Christian is concerned, you’re either a member of a persecuted minority, or part of a solid majority. Figure out which one of those is the case, and then live with it. You don’t get to switch back and forth depending on whether you think you can smother dissent better at any given moment by either whining that everybody’s always being mean to you, or bellowing that this is your house and you make the rules.

16. Speaking of persecuted minorities: Christianity used to be one. Did you fight your way to freedom of faith just so you could treat nonbelievers the same way they used to treat you?

http://www.iamanatheist.com/wishlist.html
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June 12, 2014 9:31pm
Johnboy

You could disguise it as a huge southern runway extension Pete and you’d probably get heaps of party votes from the Wellington business community specially if removing that stupid sign was part of the plan! 🙂
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June 12, 2014 9:37pm
RightNow

There is no such thing as “catastrophic anthropogenic global warming”

finally!
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June 12, 2014 9:54pm
Fletch

The ipcc warns of the future. it is the best report of the knowledge on the subject we have.
All Major scientific bodies agree about the effects and outlook for the future as expressed by the ipcc.

And yet the IPCC has slashed the amount of warming in its latest report, so much so, that i do not think we need to fear.

“Overall, in the absence of major volcanic eruptions – which would cause significant but temporary cooling – and, assuming no significant future long term changes in solar irradiance, it is likely (>66% probability) that the GMST [global mean surface temperature] anomaly for the period 2016–2035, relative to the reference period of 1986–2005, will be in the range 0.3°C–0.7°C (expert assessment, to one significant figure; medium confidence).” (IPCC, 2013, p. 11-52).

That is from their own report.
As one observer pointed out, if that rate continued till 2100, global warming this century could be as little as 1.3 Cº.
I think the planet can handle that.
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June 12, 2014 10:06pm
Griff

😆
Fletch

I can see math and in particular statistics are not your strong point

compared to the anomaly between 1986 and 2006 the next twenty years is going to add half as much to as much warming as we have caused since the beginning of the industrial revolution.
then what?
.7 now
1 to 1.4 degrees warming 2016 to 2035

If the warming is liner then.

1.3 to 2.1 in 2036 to 2055

We are already hitting worse case what is considered the bounds of safe warming for civilization

By 2076 to 2095 and best case we are outside what we can realistically cope with.

This is well within the bounds of a possible life time. Not very long at all

The 2c limit on warming is considered to be as high as we can risk for our future prospects.
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June 12, 2014 11:13pm
cha

Of course the planet can handle it Fletch….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKBC4O5aNR0
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June 12, 2014 11:22pm
mike tan

“We’ve put this website together quickly to make sure we get the party registered on time, so please note the form will not work on mobile or tablet.”

Ugh. Come on IP.
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June 12, 2014 11:57pm
Left Right and Centre

Roadlice Report:

Decent size roundabout in evening (Porirua NW). Three exits. I cycle past exit one to use exit two headed south to north. It’s a straight through – same road. Island FOB in car style people mover drives from exit one turning to his left toward exit two. Doesn’t see me at all and drives slowly straight at me. I pedal left of lane to right of lane to try and get to middle of road and get the hell away from dipshit. It takes a number of seconds to the point where there is now half a metre at most between right front corner of car and my back wheel before shit for brains finally notices an object right in front of his eyes.

I’m in dark clothing but it’s not dark at that intersection it’s well lit with big overhead street lamps.

What can I try to avoid being hit by thick as pigshit FOBS, huh ? Get me a neon glowing golden arches sign ? Dress up as a tin of corned beef ? They’d fuckin notice me then, wouldn’t they ? Maybe they’re not used to looking for people that aren’t so insanely fat that they’re guaranteed to get type 2 diabetes ? Half of them shouldn’t have a licence – useless retards mate.
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June 13, 2014 3:29am
Left Right and Centre

Fat person trapped inside a dieter’s body files:

To celebrate still being able to ride a bike and continue being alive (see above comment) I definitely had the nicety I’d planned.

Recipe: Dessert – 100mls full cream, 300mls lite coconut cream, instant dessert mix (Greggs, Hansells etc). That’s it or you can add a bit of cornflour to thicken it up, and then a bit of icing sugar to sweeten the savoury cornflour and thicken up some more. Mix with electric whisk etc. Put some in a bowl (because you can’t wait to have some) and the rest in the fridge to actually attempt to set ‘properly’ (it doesn’t do much but anyway). Use teaspoon to dollop small amounts onto ‘fizzy mag wheel’ sweet (subject to availability from your friendly still alive dairy owner) and enjoy.

Also works well for stretching a Cadbury Rose’s chocolate. Place choc in mouth but savour slowly while lapping up the dessert.

BLOODY DELICIOUS !! When your favourite TV programme ends (in this case Best Of Top Gear followed later by The Inbetweeners) – quickly hide remaining Rose’s and other dessert paraphernalia (except cream of course) in the shed so there’s something there for the next day.
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June 13, 2014 3:45am
ShawnLH

“0/10 for me on that Shawn.”

I generally score you 0/10 in terms of thinking in general Pete.
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June 13, 2014 5:55am
MT_Tinman

Left Right and Centre (2,702 comments) says:
June 13th, 2014 at 3:29 am
Roadlice Report:

I’m in dark clothing

Then you are a complete and utter fucking idiot!
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June 13, 2014 6:36am
Fletch

1 to 1.4 degrees warming 2016 to 2035

If the warming is liner then.

1.3 to 2.1 in 2036 to 2055

The lower estimate is 0.3 deg C. The top 0.7
It works out just fine (and it’s not my maths).
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June 13, 2014 8:24am
Left Right and Centre

MT_Tinman – I’m obeying the law. My whole journey is well lit. Can you see someone dressed in dark clothing in your lounge with the lights on dick ? Dark clothing except for white glowing legs.

Anyone that gets on the roads with all the FOBS ‘driving’ is an utter fucking idiot.

Dark clothing or dumb FOB. Which one was the bigger factor ? I’d say dumb FOB by about 1 000 times. You could wear a lit up xmas tree – they’re blind, deaf and dumb. And he was fat beyond a joke of course – wearing out the suspension and increased tyre wear on one corner, driver’s seat munted into a distorted shape by something it was never designed for. Fuck me – made by Japs for people who weigh half as much. They must feel all of their many many fat rolls squashed up against the driver’s door. Opening it must be like a dam busting open. You need a good catch on the door – it’ll just pop open under the enormous strain. You might start to see a few doorless FOB mobiles soon to get around that problem. Next they’ll get vans with a centre steered front bench seat and three stripped out rows to have a space capacious enough to squeeze the herd into on their way to the drive thru. Heated roof rack storage lockers for the junk food.
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June 13, 2014 8:59am

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