General Debate 11 May 2013

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Redbaiter

Obama government uses IRS to harass Conservative groups

http://bigstory.ap.org/article/irs-apologizes-targeting-conservative-groups

The US is on the slippery slope to totalitarianism and it is the Progressives who have taken it there.
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May 11, 2013 8:01am
Redbaiter

Homosexual fascists- the kind that John Banks and the National Party support, attack private property rights.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10882942

Owner of business forced to shut down his facebook page after deluge of hate messages.

John Key’s Progressive National Party has tacitly encouraged this kind of viciousness.

Remember it well next election
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May 11, 2013 8:05am
Kea

Remember it well next election

Are you intending to vote Labour Red ?
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May 11, 2013 8:07am
Michael

Dita De Boni’s column in the Herald sums up everything wrong with the NZ attitude – we want the Government to provide more healthcare, but also never create efficiency to do it.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/opinion/news/article.cfm?c_id=466&objectid=10882539

John Roughan’s column in the Herald sums up everything wrong with the NZ attitude – we want the Government to tilt the playing field to those deemed less fortunate.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/opinion/news/article.cfm?c_id=466&objectid=10882884

Ditto Janet McAllister – more housing, but no new land for housing in the urban boundaries.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/opinion/news/article.cfm?c_id=466&objectid=10882914

No surprise with Brian Rudman being another – dirty Wellington local politicians want handouts, don’t give them there but give them to Auckland because it won’t count as “regional development” here.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/opinion/news/article.cfm?c_id=466&objectid=10882661

Where is there a columnist/opinion/pundit willing to say: “If you think more Government is the solution, why the hell did the Soviet Union fall?”
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May 11, 2013 8:14am
Harriet

Another case of the left sneering at parents:

Kathleen Parker of The Washington Post saw through the smokescreen:

“They lost me on the word women,” she wrote. Parker pointed to the argument “that any interference with the over-the-counter sale of Plan B[morning after pill] to any female of any age is blocking a woman’s right to self-determination.”
She retorted: “Fifteen-year-olds, where the Obama Administration wants to set the limit, are girls, not women.”

Public policy, she added, “should be aimed at involving, rather than marginalizing, parents.”

But, marginalizing parents is one of the major aims of those who would educate our teenagers and children about sex, sexuality, and abortion. On May 8, Newsday reported that New York City public health officials are releasing a smartphone app for teenagers that will help them “locate free clinics that can answer questions about sex, prescribe birth control, test for sexually transmitted diseases, or even provide an abortion.”

The app, tested earlier in the spring and released to the public on May 7, “is expressly intended to let teenagers get information about reproductive health services confidentially, without having to go through an adult.”

On its welcome screen, the app declares: “Teens in NYC have the right to sexual health services without getting permission from parents, girlfriend/boyfriends or anyone else.”

These “health authorities” are explicitly and proudly undermining parental authority and the rights of parents to be involved in the most important issues faced by their teenagers.

But, keep in mind that the new sexual revolutionaries see parents as repressive factors to be removed and marginalized so that the nation’s adolescents can be fully liberated to experiment with sex.

There is yet another very revealing dimension of this controversy, and it has to do with how many in the media are hiding behind science in making their argument for sexual revolution.

Once again, an argument about national policy on the availability of emergency contraceptives to young girls is absurdly reduced to the judgment of “scientific experts.” All moral concern and all respect for the rights and responsibilities of parents is thrown out the door. The same people who brought us “safe sex” are now trying to bring us “safe” emergency contraception for young girls.

The sexual revolutionaries now driving the cultural momentum in this society sneer at parents and hide behind misplaced arguments about “science.” The real emergency in the debate over emergency contraception for young girls is moral, not scientific.

http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/sneering-at-parents-hiding-behind-science-the-emergency-contraception-contr

The long march thru our western institutions by the communists is over, all governments need do now is the facist ‘quick step’ through families by enforcing legislation on our impressionable children.
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May 11, 2013 8:15am
Redbaiter

“Are you intending to vote Labour Red ?”

Are you intending to continue to alow your vote to be held prisoner by the deceitful Progressives who now control National?

Are you going to be every election sucked into supporting these betrayers just because they are slightly less left than Labour?

Nope- its over.

The train has to be turned around, not merely slowed down.
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May 11, 2013 8:16am
Redbaiter

The National Party has completely failed to lead by its principles.

Cowed by leftist social influences it has remained silent on what it believes in and rather than speaking out has moved to the left. Taken ground from the Labour Party.

And as the Labour Party moves even further left so will National.

For National has no strategy other than taking the left’s ground. This cycle has to end.

Magie Thatcher spoke out bravely against the left and was rewarded by popular support and a long term in government. She had conviction and she expressed that conviction.

John Key has no such conviction. Worse, he surrounds himself with advisors sourced from left wing media outlets.

Key has to go. Like David Cameron in the UK and George Bush in the USA he is only a tool of the left, warming the government seats for their return.

The Progressive cycle has to end and the idea-less inarticulate and uninspiring Key has to go.
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May 11, 2013 8:30am
bringbackdemocracy

Apparently new MP Aaron Gilmore does not enjoy the Prime Minister’s confidence, but why then was he placed higher on the National party list than;
Maggie Barrie MP for North Shore
Ian Mc Kelvie MP for Rangatiki
Mark Mitchel MP for Rodney
Mike Sabin MP for Northland
http://www.elections.org.nz/events/past-events-0/2011-general-election/parties-candidates-and-promoters-2011-general-election—2

Gilmore is the same man today as he was when the National list was drawn up, he has the same character now as he had then.

If the Conservatives had won an electorate seat, they would have 3 MPs in parliament, National, Labour and the Greens would each have one less.
Oh and Aaron Gilmore would not be an MP today.

A party vote for National in 2011 was a vote for Aaron Gilmore to be an MP.
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May 11, 2013 8:36am
joana

The K2 issue was /is really an issue of immigration..Who were the people selling this shyte? It was just another situation where no one was supposed to state the obvious.
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May 11, 2013 8:37am
Redbaiter

“why then was he placed higher on the National party list”

Exactly.

That this idiot is even in the National Party shows how hopeless they are.

No wonder they have completely forsaken their founding principles. I bet Gilmore does not have a clue what the party is meant to stand for or worse, why those principles are important.

Just a collection of meat heads.

The National Party is just a derelict shell and a disgrace to the men who founded it.
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May 11, 2013 8:41am
Michael

bringbackdempocracy – Mark Mitchell and Paul Foster-Bell would not be MPs if the Colin Craig won Rodney, but Aaron Gilmore would be as two list National MPs have resigned this term.
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May 11, 2013 8:48am
Colville

Redbaiter… are you trying to wrest PG’s crown from him with your spamming of this thread?
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May 11, 2013 9:06am
Redbaiter

Thanks for the added attention Colville.
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May 11, 2013 9:09am
Pete George

After my post of Peter Dunne’s explanation for not supporting the “Feed the Kids” bill – repeated by DPF – there has been a lot of attention on The Daily Blog, with many bizarre claims and accusations. Like:

“As a nation, it is almost as if we have embarked on a deliberate course of increasing poverty and ensuring the advent of the next generation of impoverished New Zealanders.”

“Why is there money to subsidise irrigation in the South Island or grants to businesses – but not put a bloody bowl of fucking weetbix and milk in front of a starving kid???”

“So what’s up with Peter Dunne and his awful, cold-hearted response to the crisis of child poverty afflicting this country?”

“So what you’re really saying is that we have to let children starve, in order to teach parents a lesson?”

“If you allow your self sanctimonious and astounding self-rightousness that blames the parents for hungry children as your justification of not supporting feeding the kids – you do hate children.”

“The very people who sing the ‘blame the parents’ right wing song and dance routine are the exact same fucking people who have NO IDEA that the mother of all budgets set the benefits just below the nutritional minimums so that those on welfare are hungry enough to not want to stay on welfare.”

Not the best way to try and win support for a cause. It’s more like Macskasy and Bradbury know it’s a lost cause so are resorting to trying to score cheap political points.

I hate children and want them to starve…
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May 11, 2013 9:16am
Pete George

@Redbaiter

The National Party has completely failed to lead by its principles.

John Key has no such conviction. Worse, he surrounds himself with advisors sourced from left wing media outlets.

Key has to go.

It’s pointless saying Key has to go without having an alternative.

Who do you suggest he is replaced with? It would have to be a current MP.
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May 11, 2013 9:37am
Redbaiter

The National Party can wander in the political wilderness until they come up with someone like Ted Cruze.
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May 11, 2013 9:41am
Pete George

Do you mean Ted Cruz, whose primary focus is retaining gun “rights” in the US?
http://www.tedcruz.org/

National are not likely to come up with a US politician as their leader. Which means you don’t have a better option – you don’t even have any alternative.
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May 11, 2013 10:02am
Kea

Pete George, it is not gun rights, it is human rights, Ted is defending. If the government wants to take guns it can lead by example and disarm the police and military, who kill far more than the odd crazy lone gunmen. Obama can start by disarming his security staff. He could actually earn that Nobel peace prize.
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May 11, 2013 10:08am
Pete George

Kea – when you go to his website the first and only statement is: “I do not want President Obama undermining gun rights!”

And when you go on to his main Home page his first endorsements are interesting:
* National Right to Life Coalition
* Texas Alliance for Life
* National Rifle Assn. PVF
* Gun Owners of America
* US Chamber of Commerce
– more business associations followed

So business interests are lower than “right to life” and rights to kill. Doesn’t sound like anything that a National Party person.

And I doubt Colin Craig would be a promoter of firearms.
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May 11, 2013 10:19am
Left Right and Centre

Wellington weather

Summer feels like it was just yesterday. Time goes very quickly. I can see my breath in my poverty shack and I’m wrapped up like a mummy freezing my nads off. Do I really have to run today?
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May 11, 2013 10:22am
Redbaiter

“Pete George, it is not gun rights, it is human rights, Ted is defending.”

It is the citizen’s duty under the auspices of the 2nd Amendment to the Constitution to arm themselves to defend against tyrannical government.

Human rights are a Marxist concept and Marxist language you drooling gape jawed idiot.

BTW, as I seldom consider it worthwhile to discuss issues with trolls like you, you need to do the same with PG. Every time you engage with the fool you’re into a huge litany of misrepresentations of what you have meant and an habitual dyslexic failure to cope with logic.

Guns are not the fucking issue with Ted Cruz. It is his fearlessness in opposing the left in the Democrats and the Republicans that makes him worthy of support. The same kind of fearlessness we desperately need to see in some NZ politician.

PG has not the faintest clue as usual.
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May 11, 2013 10:23am
jaba

PETER GARRETT IS DEFINITELY A COUPLE OF CANS SHORT OF A SLAB!
The Australian Government and the NSW Forestry Service were presenting an alternative to NSW sheep farmers for controlling the dingo population.

It seems that after years of the sheep farmers using the tried and tested methods of shooting and/or trapping the predators, the Labor Government (Peter Garrett – Environmental Minister), the NSW Forestry Service and the Greens ‘tree-huggers’ had a more ‘humane’ solution.

What they proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males would then be castrated and,wait for it, let loose again.

Therefore, the dingo population would be controlled.

This was ACTUALLY proposed to the NSW Sheep Farmers Association.

All of the sheep farmers thought about this amazing idea, for a couple of minutes.

Finally, one of the old boys in the back of the conference room stood up, pushed his hat back and said, “Mr Garrett, son, I don’t think you understand our problem. The dingo’s aren’t fucking our sheep, they’re eating them.”

You needed to have been there to hear the roar of laughter as Mr Peter Garrett and the members of the NSW Forestry Service, the Greens and the other ‘tree-huggers’ left the meeting very ‘sheepishly’.

Someone save us from these idiots…..
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May 11, 2013 10:36am
Pete George

PG has not the faintest clue as usual.

The reality is, as usual, Redbaiterhas not got the faintest clue how Key could be replaced with a “better” leader.

And he falls back on his usual excuse – he refuses to “engage” with anyone who points out the deficiencies in his arguments. He can’t back up his statements. Same old.
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May 11, 2013 10:37am
Fletch

Comedian Steven Crowder on the Benghazi scandel, during which he interviews a few campus students who know nothing about it at all (“Ben who”?). The youth of today, so uninformed…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFRtZEj5pwQ
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May 11, 2013 10:49am
Pete George

Matthew Hooton is tootin’ for a National+Winston government, with a few baubles for Peters to swing the deal.

This is as bad as Labour giving up on going it alone and becoming dependent on Greens for any chance of being in government.

If National signals a dependence on Winston the swing voters in the middle would then have the dilemma of a choice between National+Winston versus Labour+Greens+Mana.

Perhaps Hooton hopes that many voters will give up in horror and that National may emerge victorious from the ruins of an election.

Hooton tootin’ for National+Winston has to be taken with a sea-ful of salt.
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May 11, 2013 10:58am
Fletch

How about this genius – a theatre owner thought he would spice up the première of Iron Man 3 at his establishment by having a gun wielding man with assault weapons storm the place; just to make it more “exciting”.

JEFFERSON CITY, Mo. –
Management at the Goodrich Capital 8 Theaters is defending what it calls a publicity stunt at the movie theaters this past weekend.

During the opening weekend of the latest ‘Iron Man’ movie, a man walked into the theater in full tactical gear and carrying a fake gun.

Jefferson City police and witnesses, however, are not pleased with the stunt and are questioning the theater’s logic after recent shootings in Aurora, Colo. and Newtown, Conn.

John Molock is a retired Army war veteran and suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder. He told ABC 17 News this most recent trip to the movies triggered memories he never wanted to relive.

“We had just finished watching Iron Man 3,” said Morlock. “We’re just getting into the car when I spotted a man in full assault gear, carrying what appeared to be a modified M-4 and 9 mm on his side.”

Morlock did not call police, but several other moviegoers did.

“We received a series of 911 calls stating that a man dressed in all black and body armor and a rifle was walking into Capital 8 Theaters,” said Capt. Doug Shoemaker.

Officers thought they were responding to an active shooter investigation.

“Everything was in place, it’s the opening night of a superhero movie, it’s somebody walking in all-dark clothes, everything pointed to bad things about to happen,” said Shoemaker. “There’s really no good that can come of this.”

Instead, it was all part of a publicity stunt for the movie opening. The man in tactical gear was an actor carrying a fake gun.

Capital 8 Theaters manager Bob Wilkins told ABC 17 News this was planned months in advance and only a few people were upset, but hundreds were entertained.

When asked if management took into consideration what happened in the the mass shooting at a Colorado movie theater, Wilkins responded, “Absolutely. That’s my number-one priority every day. It’s the safety and security of our guests.”

ABC 17 News asked Wilkins if he had any regrets for allowing the publicity stunt and he said, “No, my job is to entertain people.”

http://www.abc17news.com/news/movie-theater-publicity-stunt-triggers-officers-to-respond-to-active-shooter-situation/-/18421100/20089958/-/66o97fz/-/index.html

Never mind that the gunman at the Batman opening is still fresh in people’s minds.
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May 11, 2013 11:07am
joana

Brendan and Aaron will hold the balance of power. Fantasists forever.
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May 11, 2013 11:08am
kowtow

joanna

The ODT has been doing alot on this K2 stuff .

Note this dairy owner who refuses to sell that rubbish which every one knows is destructive and dangerous.

The Mackenzies are real New Zealanders who have real New Zealand values .

Immigrants who are granted the privelige of coming here should share New Zealand values.

http://www.odt.co.nz/news/dunedin/256512/dairy-owners-take-stand-against-aggressive-suppliers
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May 11, 2013 11:11am
Pete George

Climate – crossing a line:

Carbon dioxide in the atmosphere was measured at just above 400 p.p.m. for the 24 hour period ending at 8 p.m. E.D.T. on Thursday, the highest daily average ever recorded.

Prehistoric levels of carbon dioxide, as measured in ice bubbles, tended to oscillate between 180 and 280 p.p.m.

http://www.nytimes.com/imagepages/2013/05/11/science/0511-sci-KEELING.html
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May 11, 2013 11:19am
kowtow

We’ve crossed a line……………panic ,panic ,tax, tax, scare, scare ,control, control,legislate………,and yet ,we’re still here.

More climate propaganda from the NY Times (still doing the lefts’ work) and Petey Alarmist George.
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May 11, 2013 11:26am
Harriet

Kea#

“……400 p.p.m. for the 24 hour period ending at 8 p.m. E.D.T. on Thursday……Prehistoric levels of carbon dioxide, as measured in ice bubbles, tended to oscillate between 180 and 280 p.p.m….”

Currently the tempature here in qld is 21c, with a slight breeze, overcast, and half way through the 11th day of winter, and even if we then give PG the benefit of the doubt, the whether is still exactly about the same as when the dinasors were last seen here in Aus. Hmm… 😎
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May 11, 2013 12:47pm
Pete George

Harriet – May is generally regarded as being exactly about the same as Autumn.

Why do you think the climate was similar “when the dinasors were last seen here in Aus”.

The patterns of vegetation, together with information about the rate of tree growth, support the idea that the Earth was stifling hot 100 million years ago.

The reason for this baking hot climate seems to have been extremely high levels of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere – at least 1000 parts per million (ppm) compared to 393 ppm today.

“If carbon dioxide concentrations continue to rise unabated, we will hit Cretaceous levels in less than 250 years,” explains Falcon-Lang. “If that happens, we could see forests return to Antarctica.”

http://www.dailygalaxy.com/my_weblog/2012/02/ecoalert-earth-was-stifling-hot-during-peak-age-of-dinosaurs-1.html

The climate has always varied. The big question is whether humans are affecting the natural variations to any significant degree.
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May 11, 2013 1:06pm
UglyTruth

A survivor of a high-level ring involving child sacrifice, torture and trafficking went public today in an exclusive disclosure and interview with Freedom Central’s Mel Ve and ITCCS Field Secretary Kevin Annett.

Toos Nijenhuis, a fifty four year old physiotherapist and mother of five from Holland, was tortured, raped and used experimentally from the age of four years old by wealthy and powerful men around the world, including top officials of churches and governments.

And, Nijenhuis claims, these crimes are continuing today, including the ritual sacrifice of children in rural Holland.

http://itccs.org/2013/05/08/child-sacrifice-and-trafficking-in-holland-and-abroad-an-eyewitness-comes-forward-and-names-her-torturers/
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May 11, 2013 1:28pm
Manolo

P.G. (Griff’s in new clothes) is reciting the same old tired propaganda.
AGW and males are the enemies of humanity, according to his emasculated gospel.
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May 11, 2013 1:47pm
dishy

Another 3 dead following a police chase. Once again, we’ll hear from those who think that deaths following a police chase = deaths due to a police chase.

Responsibility for one’s own actions, anybody?
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May 11, 2013 2:07pm
Pete George

Manolo – it’s not old propaganda, it’s new scientific measurements. There were probably both men and women involved in the research.

Or perhaps you have some actual facts to base an argument on – can you point to conflicting scientific measurements?

Are you a woman?
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May 11, 2013 2:18pm
Johnboy

Fletch at 10:49… 🙂 One of lifes great unaswered questions….

Why did Bill get Monica to do the job when Hillary had a mouth that big? 🙂
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May 11, 2013 2:22pm
Manolo

The tongue did the trick, Johnboy.
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May 11, 2013 2:26pm
Johnboy

Too late. Answer is Little Willy could touch the sides of Monicas tiny little mouth! 🙂
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May 11, 2013 2:26pm
Manolo

On topic. Valid question or not?: http://www.smh.com.au/world/are-you-into-deviant-sex-20130509-2jaed.html
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May 11, 2013 2:28pm
publicwatchdog

Hi Kiwibloggers! 🙂

errrr…. Arrogant Gilmore is not facing Court proceedings for an offence for which he could be jailed for up to 2 years, unlike the Defendant John Banks.

Why has Prime Minister John Key, not yet stood down John Banks as Minister of Regulatory Reform, Minister of Small Business, Associate Minister of Education and Associate Minister of Commerce?

Arguably not a particularly ‘good look’ for New Zealand, ‘perceived’ to be the ‘least corrupt country in the world’ (along with Denmark and Finland, according to the 2012 Transparency International ‘Corruption Perception Index’?

Seen these?

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10201165223716343&set=p.10201165223716343&type=1&theater

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10201165224476362&set=p.10201165224476362&type=1

Have a LOVELY day 🙂

Penny Bright
‘Anti-corruption / anti-privatisation’ campaigner

2013 Auckland Mayoral candidate
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May 11, 2013 2:29pm
Johnboy

Quite right Penny. The law is far too lenient in New Zealand. Weirdos that don’t pay rates, damage water meters and whats worse abuse the human rights of the rest of the population by posting their really ugly visages on hoardings seem to get away scot free. 🙂
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May 11, 2013 2:34pm
Manolo

Weirdos? Why so considerate?
The terms parasites, bludgers and leeches seem more appropriate.
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May 11, 2013 2:40pm
Johnboy

I’m still waiting for my enrolment at Redbaiters finishing school to be accepted Manolo.
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May 11, 2013 2:44pm
UglyTruth

In comments that went largely unnoticed, Missouri Congresswoman Ann Wagner (R) directly blamed President Obama for ordering the stand down which facilitated the assault on the US consulate in Benghazi.

Wagner was asked by talk show host Dana Loesch, “Because you have been an ambassador, you have been overseas with similar responsibilities and similar missions – who gives such an order to stand down? Where does that come from?”

“The President of the United States,” responded Wagner.

….

A growing body of evidence also suggests that the entire purpose of the consulate in Benghazi and Ambassador Stevens’ role there was to oversee clandestine arms shipments to Syrian rebels.

http://www.infowars.com/congresswoman-obama-gave-benghazi-stand-down-order/
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May 11, 2013 4:03pm
PhilP

In today’s Dom Post there are heaps of articles on Aaron Gilmore including one on the front page. I fail to see the how this is such HUGE news for days after days but not a Dickie Bird about Liarbores $430,000 bequest/donation that they didn’t think was a donation for a year. But then if I am being a conspiracy theorist I would say that all the stories abut Aaron Gilmore is a sly way for the Left MSM of getting at the National Party and John Key. Am I right or wrong?……….
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May 11, 2013 4:20pm
Johnboy

Your just as right as I am when I say I prefer news about sheep to news about anything else PhilP.

No one takes any notice at all of us sensible blokes! 🙂
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May 11, 2013 4:26pm
kowtow

ugly truth @ 128 child sacrifice etc

You are taking the piss?
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May 11, 2013 4:50pm
UglyTruth

kowtow,
No, I’m not. Nijenhuis’ story is similar to Cathy O’Brien’s & Cisco Wheeler’s stories.
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May 11, 2013 5:08pm
Viking2

Emails emerged yesterday which led to his contract ending.

Isn’t this interesting.
Who released a bunch of Govt. department emails to the press?

Which Dept. is implicated?

Well there were two Treasury, who are ususally veru circumspect about their communications an d Ministry of Housing.

Being a devot conspiracy theorist I have to ask. Who is their Minister??

Clue. well, he hails from Nelson, has been involed in leaky stuff before, indeed was instrumental in down grading building construction to the point where leaks caused deconstruction. Had issues with a leaky ACC.

Oh dear the man leaks all over the place.

Which Labour MP is going to ask the obvious question when the next question time arises in the house.
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May 11, 2013 5:11pm
F E Smith

And now for something completely different. Via Andrew Bolt, I note an interesting copy and past from an Aussie newspaper article (bold is mine):

Alberto Alesina, a renowned Italian economist and professor at Harvard University, … has forensically studied the relationship between budget policy and economic growth in 21 OECD countries, including Australia, from 1970 to 2007, and concludes “not only are tax cuts more stimulatory for economic growth than spending increases, but spending cuts are much more effective than tax increases in stabilising public debt and avoiding economic downturns”.

He found that a 1 per cent permanent reduction in government spending as a share of national income boosted the rate of economic growth by up to 0.75 percentage points.

“Most countries in Europe are actually raising taxes and not cutting expenses; what happens in practice is typically quite different from what is announced,” Alesina says…

That latter bit is also interesting because we get those lefty morons who keep trying to tell us that “austerity has failed”, when in fact austerity has never actually been tried and rather it is the lefts big spending, big borrowing methods that have failed. Just like when the BBC accuses the UK’s Coalition Government of ‘cuts’ when in fact they mean ‘reductions in how much spending will increase’, because the UK has yet to actually have any real cuts in spending.
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May 11, 2013 5:45pm
Johnboy

Bought some MRP to help stimulate the economy then did you FE? 🙂
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May 11, 2013 5:51pm
F E Smith

Nah, Johnboy. One of the reasons that I am a lawyer and not a businessman is because that really isn’t my area. I’m a bit old fashioned: my money is under the mattress!!!!
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May 11, 2013 7:34pm
Johnboy

I’m deeply honoured to be able to chat to your Lordship, even if you are a tightwad! 🙂
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May 11, 2013 7:41pm
nasska

Q. What’s the difference between a Lesbian in a porno and a real life one?

A. About 12 stone.

Real life lesbians: ruining men’s sexual fantasies since the dawn of time.
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May 11, 2013 8:00pm
Johnboy

A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. “I’m sorry, sir, but I am blind and can’t read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer. I’ll smell it and order from there.”
A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man’s table and hands it to him. The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath.
“Ah, yes, that’s what I’ll have — meatloaf and mashed potatoes.”
Unbelievable, the owner thinks as he walks toward the kitchen. The cook happens to be the owner’s wife. He tells her what had just happened.
The blind man eats his meal and leaves.
Several days later, the blind man returns and the owner mistakenly brings him a menu again.
“Sir, remember me? I’m the blind man.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t recognize you. I’ll go get you a dirty fork.”
The owner retrieves a dirty fork and brings it to the blind man.
After another deep breath, the blind man says, “That smells great. I’ll take the macaroni and cheese with broccoli.”
Walking away in disbelief, the owner thinks the blind man is screwing around with him and tells his wife that the next time the blind man comes in, he’s going to test him.
The blind man eats and leaves.
He returns the following week, but this time the owner sees him coming and runs to the kitchen.
He tells his wife, “Sue, rub this fork on your panties before I take it to the blind man.”
Sue complies and hands her husband the fork. As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner is ready and waiting.
“Good afternoon, sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you.”
The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff, and says, “Hey I didn’t know that Sue worked here…”
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May 11, 2013 8:00pm
Johnboy

A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says, “Okay, Mrs. Jones, what’s the problem?”
The mother says, “It’s my daughter Darla. She keeps getting these cravings, she’s putting on weight, and is sick most mornings.”
The doctor gives Darla a good examination, then turns to the mother and says, “Well, I don’t know how to tell you this, but your Darla is pregnant– about 4 months, would be my guess.”
The mother says, “Pregnant?! She can’t be, she has never ever been left alone with a man! Have you, Darla?”
Darla says, “No mother! I’ve never even kissed a man!”
The doctor walked over to the window and just stares out it. About five minutes pass and finally the mother says, “Is there something wrong out there doctor?”
The doctor replies, “No, not really, it’s just that the last time anything like this happened, a star appeared in the east and three wise men came over the hill. I’ll be damned if I’m going to miss it this time!”
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May 11, 2013 8:06pm
nasska

I told the man in a takeaway shop to go back home to his own country and fuck his dead mother last night.

He immediately grabbed a baseball bat and started screaming at me as the rest of the staff held him back.

I honestly couldn’t believe his reaction.

That’s when I looked around at my mate Dave and said, “Are you sure that’s how you order a spring roll in Chinese?”
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May 11, 2013 8:07pm
Johnboy

A man goes into his son’s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having a nightmare – the man wakes him and asks his son if he is OK? The son replies he is scared because he dreamt that Auntie Susie had died. The father assures the son that Auntie Susie is fine and sends him to bed.
The next day, Auntie Susie dies.
One week later, the man again goes into his son’s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having another nightmare – the man again wakes his son. The son this time says that he had dreamt that granddaddy had died. The father assures the son that granddaddy is fine and sends him to bed.
The next day, granddaddy dies.
One week later, the man again goes into his son’s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having another nightmare – the man again wakes his son. The son this time says that he had dreamt that daddy had died. The father assures the son that he is OK and sends the boy to bed.
The man goes to bed but cannot sleep because he is so terrified.
The next day, the man is scared for his life- he is sure is going to die. After dressing he drives very cautiously to work fearful of a collision. He doesn’t eat lunch because he is scared of food poisoning. He avoids everyone for he is sure he will somehow be killed. He jumps at every noise, starts at every movement and hides under his desk.
Upon walking in his front door at the end of the day, he finds his wife. “Good God, Dear,” he proclaims, “I’ve just had the worst day of my entire life!”
She responds, “You think your day was bad, the milkman dropped dead on the doorstep this morning.”
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May 11, 2013 8:12pm
Harriet

FES#

“Most countries in Europe are actually raising taxes and not cutting expenses;..”

Exactly what Aus is doing too. But unlike Europe, the tax revenue in Aus has been increasing the last year or 2 and they still can’t meet their own budget. Spending is then very clearly out of control.

BTW. Before the GFC California got most of it’s taxes from the very wealthy, but immediatly after the GFC, the wealthy were only half as rich, so California only received half it’s budgeted tax revenue. That’s why they too are BROKE, yet they are not a ‘welfare state’ anywhere to the degree of Europe.
In other words, by taxing only the wealthy, the government is essentually playing the stock and property markets, and when they collapse, so too does tax revenue, leading to the collapse of states or governments. Cheers.
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May 11, 2013 8:12pm
nasska

What do you call a man who combines necrophilia and bestiality by fucking dead animals?

No, it isn’t a joke, I’m trying to fill in the ‘Hobbies and interests’ section of my job application.
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May 11, 2013 8:16pm
Johnboy

And a joke for my old mate F.E. Smith! 🙂

An elderly spinster called the lawyer’s office and told the receptionist she wanted to see the lawyer about having a will
prepared. The receptionist suggested they set up an appointment for a convenient time for the spinster to come into the office.

The woman replied, “You must understand, I’ve lived alone all my life, I rarely see anyone, and I don’t like to go out. Would it be possible for the lawyer to come to my house?”

The receptionist checked with the attorney who agreed and he went to the spinster’s home for the meeting to discuss her estate
and the will. The lawyer’s first question was, “Would you please tell me what you have in assets and how you’d like them to be distributed under your will?”

She replied, “Besides the furniture and accessories you see here, I have $400,000 in my savings account at the bank.”

“Tell me,” the lawyer asked, “how would you like the $400,000 to be distributed?”

The spinster said, “Well, as I’ve told you, I’ve lived a reclusive life, people have hardly ever noticed me, so I’d like them to
notice when I pass on. I’d like to provide $350,000 for my funeral.”

The lawyer remarked, “Well, for $350,000 you will be able to have a funeral that will certainly be noticed and will leave a lasting
impression on anyone who may not have taken much note of you! But tell me,” he continued, “what would you like to do with the remaining $50,000?”

The spinster replied, “As you know, I’ve never married, I’ve lived alone almost my entire life, and in fact I’ve never slept
with a man. Before I die, I’d like you to use the $50,000 to arrange for a man to sleep with me.”

“This is a very unusual request,” the lawyer said, adding, “but I’ll see what I can do to arrange it and get back to you.” That
evening, the lawyer was at home telling his wife about the eccentric spinster and her weird request. After thinking about how much she could do around the house with $50,000, and with a bit of coaxing, she got her husband to agree to provide the service himself.

She said, “I’ll drive you over tomorrow morning, and wait in the car until you’re finished.” The next morning, she drove him to the spinster’s house and waited while he went into the house. She waited for over an hour, but her husband didn’t come out. So she blew the car horn.

Shortly, the upstairs bedroom window opened, the lawyer stuck his head out and yelled, “Pick me up tomorrow! She’s going to
let the County bury her!”
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May 11, 2013 8:20pm
Harriet

You can call me “The Fireman”….mainly because I turn the hoes on!
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May 11, 2013 8:22pm
cha

All feathers and shit.

http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/local/dupage-county-roselle-sexual-abuse-peacock-206997171.html
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May 11, 2013 8:24pm
nasska

A young boy comes home from school one day and says, “Mummy, mummy! What’s a lesbian?”

She replied, “Ask your father when she gets home!”
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May 11, 2013 8:25pm
Johnboy

And another for my new friend:

A man went to his lawyer and said, “I would like to make a will, but I don’t know exactly how to go about it.”
“No problem”, said the lawyer, “leave it all to me.”
The man looked somewhat upset and said, “Well, I knew you were going to take the biggest slice, but I would like to leave a little to my children, too.”
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May 11, 2013 8:28pm
nasska

Well, that’s a little known fetish cha. Just did a search on ‘Pornhub’ & there’s no category for “peacock sex”, gay or straight! 🙂
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May 11, 2013 8:32pm
Johnboy

Here it is nasska. Fairly straightforward for Japanese scholars or folk from the agraian sector. 🙂

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0VoDFXtWzxI
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May 11, 2013 8:41pm
cha

You really want aggregation site ‘tubegalore’ JB.
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May 11, 2013 8:46pm
nasska

Seemed pretty straightforward, run of the mill farmyard stuff JB. Only trouble is that the well dressed one may suffer a little from PE. 🙂
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May 11, 2013 8:48pm
Johnboy

Don’t we all! 🙂
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May 11, 2013 8:52pm
Johnboy

A lawyer named Strange was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. “Here lies an honest man and a lawyer,” responded the lawyer. “Sorry, but I can’t do that,” replied the stonecutter. “In this state, it’s against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put “here lies an honest lawyer” “But that won’t let people know who it is” protested the lawyer. “Certainly will,” retorted the stonecutter. “people will read it and exclaim, “That’s Strange!”
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May 11, 2013 9:16pm
Manolo

An excellent fit for the Mana Party: http://www.stuff.co.nz/dominion-post/news/politics/8661548/Gilmore-no-show-at-conference
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May 12, 2013 7:21am
Manolo

They are killing themselves: http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10883071
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May 12, 2013 7:25am

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