General Debate 25 March 2013

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Pete George

Shane Jones was interviewed on Marae Investigates yesterday. He kept bringing up Bill Liu, claiming he was “vindicated of any wrongdoing”.

Ironically for a Labour MP he said (of the Maori party):

In politics if you are fundamentally split it won’t be long to go before it’s all over.

When asked what his priorities would be everything he mentioned, even when related to unemployment problems – health, radio spectrum, Maori television, native tree planting – involve taxpayer cost. He has been talked of as relatively right wing for a Labour MP, but here he was all socialist Maori.

Marae Investigates Shane Jones – another handout Hone?
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March 25, 2013 8:10am
Monique Watson

A dongle joke goes pear-shaped at Python Developers Conference:
http://nowoccupy.blogspot.com/2013/03/show-us-your-dongle-xx-developer-calls.html
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March 25, 2013 8:11am
Viking2

The Grass is growing again. Rain last night and this morning.

Cricket to get washed out once more?
Now that will piss off PEB abd KS.
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March 25, 2013 8:18am
Northland Wahine

@ Monique…

The silly bint, no doubt there is a law suit being placed.

A simple ” dudes, rumour has it your own dongles are somewhat inadequate in size and function, so I can understand the need to make constant jokes about your sad appendages. Now hush or I’ll give you a rendition of my child birth stories”

Sorted.
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March 25, 2013 8:25am
duggledog

DPF, will you be posting on the insurance changes today? I am very interested in this, would be very keen to read what others think.
Cheers
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March 25, 2013 8:27am
Pauleastbay

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/obituaries/culture-obituaries/film-obituaries/9948851/Harry-Reems.html

A good life story
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March 25, 2013 8:35am
Pauleastbay

V2

beautiful morning in Auckland, mild and no sign of rain, two more days of real cricket to come,
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March 25, 2013 8:36am
Monique Watson

@NW. Agreed.
A simple, “don;t be a dongle” would have shut them down if they were really annoying her.
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March 25, 2013 8:36am
peterwn

See:
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10873212

IRD wants the rules changed so if a non-resident owns a house, bach etc in NZ which is available for him/her to live in, the person is regarded as a ‘resident’ for tax purposes. I am trying to get my head round whether the idea has merit or is another loopy idea out of IRD. IRD naturally wants to ‘catch’ those who spend significant amounts of time in NZ but are ‘resident’ of some tax haven, but the proposed move IMO is unlikely to help significantly. There is an easy way of ‘avoiding’ this issue – just dispose of the ‘offending’ property. The move is more likely to inconvenience ex-pats who already pay taxes in the likes of UK, etc where most of the taxes are deducted as withholding payments, so there would be a significant compliance effort for very little revenue.

The IRD is becoming an embarrassment to the Government – it seriously embarrassed the previous National government with its harsh penalties regime. It does not help having its responsible Minister outside Cabinet and National. Given the wide nature of tax legislation and the existence of many ‘policies’ in IRD, it seems a proper ‘no surprises’ process is required so that proposed policy changes can be checked at a political level early on.
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March 25, 2013 8:44am
Kleva Kiwi

Hundreds of thousands of people protest against gay marriage
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=10873437
Now if only the socialists in power would listen
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March 25, 2013 8:48am
Keeping Stock

You going to the park today pauleastbay?
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March 25, 2013 8:59am
Pauleastbay

KS will try, I’ve had to work all weekend and have got a gig starting at 12 today, depending on what time I finish that. Flat out at the moment so I may struggle to get there.
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March 25, 2013 9:02am
Pauleastbay

V2

Just talking to a mate at Te Teko 5 minutes ago.

You’ll be happy to know that Tamiti Kruger and Co won’t be charging an admittance fee to get into the park for a hunt or tramp BUT they will be charging an “administration fee” .

You see, its all in the language so when you are bent over it doesn’t hurt so much.
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March 25, 2013 9:05am
dime

What is the thinking on interest rates at the moment?

Dime purchased a new rental yesterday.. need to decide what to do.

Fix for one year at a cheap rate.. or pay a touch more and fix for two.

it would suck to come of fixed in 12 months and be jabbed with an extra percent..
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March 25, 2013 9:06am
Pete George

dime – think about fixing half for longer and floating the rest.
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March 25, 2013 9:20am
hmmokrightitis

duggle, it will be very interesting re:insurance changes. Annual valuations? Wish I could buy shares in a valuation firm 🙂

We just had a valuation completed for insurance purposes. $750 + GST and costs. AMI refused to insure without a full site inspection – they are our normal insurers. Fuck you lot then.

Dime, FWIW, we fixed for 2 years. TBH, I dont think the rate is going anywhere major in the next 12 to 18. The real issue might be stability – if labour and the greens start to look like a likely gubbermint in that time, watch our risk profile go through the roof.
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March 25, 2013 9:21am
skyblue

Dime – fix for 5 years if you think Russell Norman will be the next Finance Minister!
By the time the 5 years is up hyper-inflation will have got rid of the debt so you should be able to pay for the rest of the house with a $10000000 note and get change!
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March 25, 2013 9:34am
dime

hmmo – yeah the thought of a labour lead shambles is a concern.

if i fix for 2 years it will cost me about $40 a week more than fixing for 1.. maybe thats cheap for piece of mind.

maybe i should just fix for 6 months and then make a call?

the house i live in is fixed for another 18 months.. but that mortgage is tiny in comparison to what i just signed myself up for!
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March 25, 2013 9:35am
flipper

Petrerwn…
Good post.
Say, do we not have a foreign import in the post of IRD Commissioner?
If so, a repeat of Education?
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March 25, 2013 9:41am
dime

skyblue – lol true that

the banks must have an out clause for situations like that?

section 17b “if a lisping ginga fuckwit becomes finance minister this mortgage will be void once rates go past 25%” or some such
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March 25, 2013 9:43am
hmmokrightitis

dime, weve done the same. We were going to hold off to await the coming tidal wave – IMHO – of businesses and property that the boomers will start selling as they look to cash up, but we got wind of a property coming up for sale at our favourite lake and decided to just to take the plunge and go for it.

We now have a great holiday home with perfect views, and the boat coming soon 🙂

Ive always leaned towards fixing for slightly longer than gut tells me, simply because its good insurance, I have certainty and I keep learning that markets move more slowly than I expect.

But then Im working towards cashing up myself over the next 2 years, and by that stage should be debt free again. Thats the plan anyway 🙂
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March 25, 2013 9:47am
WineOh

@ insurance changes

http://www.radionz.co.nz/news/national/131207/homeowners-warned-about-coming-insurance-change

Of course the risk transfer from insurer to home owner will mean a substantial reduction in premiums right??

“The private insurance brokerage Apex General says getting and renewing residential house cover will initially be more complex, but the changes have long-term positive benefits for the market.”

Hahaha! long term positive benefits for the insurance company, not the insured.
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March 25, 2013 10:04am
RightNow

Cold weather killing thousands in the UK. Perhaps cheaper energy would have saved them.
I wonder if griff and other AGW alarmists feel any sense of shame?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2298246/UKs-coldest-spring-1963-claims-5-000-lives-Pensioners-worst-affected–experts-say-final-toll-horrendous.html
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March 25, 2013 10:09am
publicwatchdog

Here you go Kiwibloggers!

What do you think about all this ‘democracy for developers’?

25 March 2013

Press Release – Housing Lobby Spokesperson Sue Henry ” Don’t fast-track the Auckland Unitary Plan!”

“The Unitary Plan should not be fast-tracked and signed off this side of the local body elections, with so much dissent from communities, who do not want unfettered property developers intensifying their suburbs beyond recognition,” says Housing Lobby Spokesperson Sue Henry.

“The ‘tiff’ between Mayor Len Brown and Housing Minister Nick Smith is a diversion from the fact that there is already an alignment set in concrete between Wellington and the Auckland Mayor. ”

“Three east Auckland suburbs, Panmure, Point England and Glen Innes, have already been signed off between the Mayor and the previous Housing Minister, Phil Heatley, into a company, implementing the ‘Tamaki Transformation Programme’, through a ‘Heads of Agreement’ which was signed off behind closed doors, excluding the residents.”

“Which suburbs will be next?
What other communities want to be turned into a ‘company’ without their consent?”

Sue Henry
Housing Lobby Spokesperson
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March 25, 2013 10:25am
Kea

RightNow, The people of Europe have never seen such freezing heat.

It gets worse though. The people promoting AGW are raising the cost of energy production, making it unaffordable for the most vunerable to heat their homes. The poor and old folk are dying in increasing numbers, as the harsh winters continue across Europe, year after year.

Griff and his ilk have blood on their hands.
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March 25, 2013 10:26am
Viking2

Pete George (16,820) Says:
March 25th, 2013 at 9:20 am

dime – think about fixing half for longer and floating the rest.

ah Pete fence sitting as usual.

Dime, I ‘ve just fixed mine (1.5mil) 1 yr because I agree with Bagrie of ANZ that the rates are going nowhere for a long time because of Europe.

Depending on how much you are borrowing you should get a reasonable rate.
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March 25, 2013 10:26am
Pete George

Haha V2 – but it’s not fence sitting, it’s being reasonably prudent but with some risk.
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March 25, 2013 10:42am
Pete George

Re housing, the Greens are having a “Public Meeting On Better Housing For West Auckland” with assurances they can “Giving Our Kids A Home For Life”.

I was glad my kids moved out when they became adults, and by then they had lived in seven homes. I don’t see how the Greens would have changed any of that.

More Utopian Dream to be funded by those who work and pay taxes. “Home for life” a Green promise?

Ah, and Metiria’s “photo for life” doesn’t look convincing in their advertising.
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March 25, 2013 10:50am
Pete George

http://www.stuff.co.nz/timaru-herald/opinion/steve-braunias/8460388/The-Secret-Diary-of-David-Shearer

TUESDAY

Ran into Left-wing political commentators Chris Trotter and Brian Edwards.

Chris spat at my feet, and said, “That bandit leader was only trying to provide for the working men and women of his community. Shame on you. You’re a class traitor of the worst kind.”

Brian slapped my face, and said, “David Cunliffe would have won the villains over with his charisma and political wiles, and a boyish smile creasing his handsome face.”

Ran into Right-wing commentator David Farrar.

He shook my hand, and said, “Good morning.”
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March 25, 2013 11:22am
Monique Watson

Don’t fix for two years Dime unless you want to stagger your loans so that you try and track with an average interest cost. I’m currently fixing some facilities for six months and others for a year. Still some on floating. Short term swap rates came down just before Christmas and are starting to come down again so you might get better rates for two years plus over the next six months. I’ve set myself reminders to fix long by the end of next year because there is potentially going to be huge housing inflation with Chch and however the pollies end up fucking up Auckland.
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March 25, 2013 11:26am
Paulus

As once for my 40 year + career I was in Reinsurance – these are the people who control the exposure of risk and the wholesale pricing structure for the Insurance Companies.
Most are all very large overseas companies with major stock exchange ratings – principally German, Swiss, US, and Lloyds.

The size of the “total” New Zealand Fire and General premium income was exceeded by something like 15 plus times – being something anticipated of $20 billion, which is/has been/being paid. Reinsurers have been financially badly hurt.

Something like 30 + years ago you could not find a replacement policy (ie unlimited liability) – this came about based upon competition for market share.

AMI had something like 40% of the Canterbury/Christchurch domestic business – their aggregation figures as we now know were totally inaccurate, leading to their demise for Earthquake claims, which have been picked up by Taxpayers and up to the limits of Reinsurance cover (exceeded).

As such there was unlimited liability as we have now seen. These Reinsurers required very regularly aggregations of liability by regional areas (say Canterbury or Wellington) from the Insurance Companies which as we now know turned out to be totally inaccurate.

With these changes they will be able to grant wholesale cover again slowly as their liability will be more accurately known, and more audits will be required by Reinsurers.

Without these changes no insurance company will seriously entertain covering earthquake liability, as their Corporate capital structures would note cope with the totals of liability – leading to possible insolvency

In California you would be lucky to buy 15% Earthquake cover – this could happen here, with or without limited liability cover.

Another major earthquake cover and even this new move could change immediately. Reinsurer’s need time to recover over some years what they have laid out for Christchurch – yes it is a new discipline for all homeowners not just Canterbury, but there was an Earthquake in Auckland last week, so they will not be immune either.

But is there an alternative – yes – no, or very limited cover for Earthquake.
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March 25, 2013 11:26am
dime

v2 – cheers. borrowing 750 stacks..
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March 25, 2013 11:26am
dime

monique – thanks 🙂

so i think ill fix for 6 months and then have a look at it.

if rates jump in the next 6 months i may have to pass the hat around 😀

as a side note – holy hell there are some garbage properties selling for huge money on the north shore. just terrible.
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March 25, 2013 11:30am
publicwatchdog

‘DEMOCRACY FOR DEVELOPERS’? WHO EXACTLY IS RUNNING AUCKLAND COUNCIL AND IN WHOSE INTERESTS???

Council sees no conflict in belonging to property body – Property – NZ Herald News

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/property/news/article.cfm?c_id=8&objectid=10873340

Penny Bright
‘Anti-corruption campaigner’
2013 Auckland Mayoral Candidate
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March 25, 2013 11:37am
sbk

“I wonder if….. AGW alarmists feel any sense of shame?” shame..nah..listening to them,their political allies and commercial backers(Big Wind) still prat on, while shoveling snow…never…but it is a shame that billions were spent to leave the old in the cold…

maybe!…John Le Carrè should base his next bestseller on the whole AGW scam…”The lie who came in from the cold”
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March 25, 2013 11:37am
Colville

Dime.
Historic low rates. If the asset is a long term hold and you can negotiate a low long fixed term I would be very tempted.
If the housing market continues to heat , rate rises will happen soon.
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March 25, 2013 11:51am
Colville

I am listening to test cricket, Fulton and McCullum starting to give the Poms some stick!
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March 25, 2013 11:52am
graham

dime, please feel free to tell me to p!ss off if you wish. 🙂 Not wishing to pry into your particular situation, but I’m curious about the strategies being employed nowadays. I did have an investment property a few years ago, but got it at a good price and the outgoings were almost entirely covered by the rent. Sold it some time back.

But I doubt very much that matching your outgoings to income would be achievable today. What is the strategy that most investors go for these days? Are they purely looking for capital growth?
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March 25, 2013 11:54am
Pete George

Even as text this looks good:

No runs off Manesar’s four overs.

39.1 Panesar to Fulton, no run, did not get up much, left outside off

“He doesn’t have a shot on the off side, can’t get it through,” that would be Matt Prior on Fulton

39.2 Panesar to Fulton, no run, drives fairly well but straight to extra cover

39.3 Panesar to Fulton, FOUR, doesn’t need elegant cover drives, slams a full delivery down the ground past mid on and gets to fifty, to go with his 136 in the first innings

39.4 Panesar to Fulton, no run, nudged to square leg

39.5 Panesar to Fulton, FOUR, sweep now, displaying the full range now, Panesar down the pads, and Fulton helps it on its way past short fine leg

39.6 Panesar to Fulton, SIX, have Prior’s taunts fired him up, he is taking Monty apart, charges out and heaves it high and huge over long on
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March 25, 2013 11:55am
kowtow

kea

Govts are also to blame. They forced people away from local and cheap sources of energy,coal and wood to expensive,unreliable and imported stuff like oil and gas.

In crises,the provider has no control over delivery.ie in storms the lines go down,or with too much demand supply is limited.Politically the sources are unreliable, be it Russian gas or Arab oil.

To think the Establishment Elites believe they know best!The latest fad is wind,subsidised in an era of massive debt!
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March 25, 2013 12:02pm
dime

graham – i will be topping this up quite a bit.

next purchase will probably be an apartment that will either pay for itself or maybe even pay me to own it 😀

i think you can get houses in the 450 – 550 band that come close to paying for themselves.
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March 25, 2013 12:06pm
dime

the cricket right now is glorious 😀
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March 25, 2013 12:06pm
Colville

I think we will declare around 450 ahead, half hour after lunch. time for Fulton to get his second ton for the match 🙂
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March 25, 2013 12:10pm
RRM

Pete George – sounds like the kind of pride that often comes before a big big BIG fall if you ask me! I would remind you this is New Zealand playing.

Although I admit I recall fondly the days when Batsman C.Cairns would suddenly just go nuts in a test match, it’s exciting to watch but whether it really is a sensible strategy for winning a test…?
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March 25, 2013 12:12pm
dime

if we set a 450 total and lose.. Dime just doesnt know what to think lol

would love to see fulton get a second hundred. its almost a stephen donald world cup moment!
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March 25, 2013 12:16pm
Pete George

They way they are going 2 Metre might have a century by lunchtime, and Baz won’t be far from a half century…if they stay in.
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March 25, 2013 12:16pm
Pete George

RRM – the NZ batsmen can safely go for it now, almost enough lead to be safe-ish, time now to demoralise England as much as possible.

It’s not over until it’s over, much hard work required, but England will have to be much better than they’ve been to survive let alone win, as long as our bowlers are patient.

Another 2 Metre six, off Anderson!

The way they’re going Fulton should go for a century before lunch, then come out to bat for ten minutes after lunch to piss England off and disrupt their prep for survival.
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March 25, 2013 12:22pm
Colville

38 off the last 3 overs 🙂
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March 25, 2013 12:25pm
dime

why is Dime working and not watching arghhh
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March 25, 2013 12:30pm
Colville

England are demoralised 🙂

Imagine NZ winning a test series!
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March 25, 2013 12:32pm
Pete George

Another 30 runs after lunch would give Fulton a chance for a century, McCullum a go for fifty and then declare past England’s first innings total with a lead of 455 – which England have never scored to win a test.

But of course England could hold out for a draw, or break a record.
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March 25, 2013 12:36pm
James Stephenson

which England have never scored to win a test.

Well a postage stamp would be the place to do it, if they’re ever going to.
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March 25, 2013 12:38pm
James Stephenson

How is it that Hamilton have a proper football stadium and a proper cricket ground, whilst we in Auckland have neither?
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March 25, 2013 12:42pm
Monique Watson

@Graham.

You gear up to accumulate a portfolio – never taking on more than you can afford to service if your properties empty out and you have to fund them yourselves. At the height of the GFC I had 10 empty beds and the interest rate was horrendous. Back to work while pregnant, We coped because we never overextended. The rooms are all full again.
Don’t worry about making a profit on day one -it used to be that you would only buy with good returns. What I do now is compare apples with apples and buy the cheapest in the market.
Then you sit make and wait for a series of left wing governments including National to implement inflationary policies which erode your loans and provide you with a nice income stream in your retirement.
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March 25, 2013 12:45pm
Viking2

Its nicks fault.
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March 25, 2013 12:53pm
Viking2

dime.
Just be a bit careful on the rent you might receive. I read this morning that Auckland rents have been dropping as people buy homes.
Similar down here. Quite a few reluctant landlords and people who have fled to Aussie with their houses rented. Both lots have been bailing and I reckon outside of central Auckland we have till later this year for that to be cleaned out. coupled with that there are a lot of older people selling to go to retirement villages. Here Ryman built one but it has 300 dwellings per se. These things never hit the radar so no one counts them as they are license to occupy. Not on real estate figures.

I recall the info was from Barfoot’s so it is either in the paper this morning or on their site.

If you are buying in central then I’d suggest that the upside is limited for a while because of the recent surge. Pick the next best place.
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March 25, 2013 12:59pm
skyblue

Looks like Cyprus have decided to visit the barber:
http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2013-03-24/rampapalooza-cyprus-troika-reach-deal
I wonder how much the haircut will be for the Russian investors, I say a no. 2 all over please.
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March 25, 2013 1:11pm
Manolo

The dope smoker will agree AGW is responsible:
http://www.spiegel.de/international/germany/germany-weathers-darkest-winter-in-43-years-a-885608.html
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2298246/UKs-coldest-spring-1963-claims-5-000-lives-Pensioners-worst-affected–experts-say-final-toll-horrendous.html
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March 25, 2013 1:26pm
dime

monique – do you ever sell and take the cap gain?

v2 – ive based everything on worst case scenario.. i should be ok.

i have access to the place before settlement so hopefully she will rent out before then.
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March 25, 2013 1:34pm
dime

Dime is so freaking happy for Fulton 🙂 🙂 made my week!
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March 25, 2013 1:46pm
Fairfacts Media

So-called ‘green energy’ does not only kill people but it kills the wider economy.
The higher power bills it fuels means people have less to spend on other things, thus depriving an economy of a consumer led recovery.
Furthermore, the higher power bills also add to costs faced by employers, so they either employer fewer people or they move offshore.
The ‘green’ policies of the UK governments in recent years have been total madness.
Labour Leader Ed Miliband was behind the climate change act which aims to reduce UK carbon output by 80% by 2050 and 20% by 20%. Not only does it means fuels costs rise to pay for birdkilling windmills, it also means coal fired power stations are being forced to close when the country needs them the most. One at Didcot was closed this month and another is converting to burning woodchips imported from the USA!
Many experts predict the lights could well go out soon in britain, with it facing mass powercuts.
Dave Cameron can take some blame for his hug-a-husky “greenest government ever” madness, but his father-in-law Reginald Sheffield will be pleased to be raking in thousands from subsidies from the windfarms on his land.
And we have the nutty green Lib Dem Chris Huhne, who is now in jail, also guilty for such energy stupidity.
Only UKIP has the correct energy policies for the UK, supporting fracking and opposing the windmill nonsnense.
UKIP are right on so many other issues and I have now become a supporter of it, while Cameron remains Tory leader.
I can only hope that the media will start to quiz the political elite for their energy policies that are causing so many deaths as well as so much economic destruction, especially as windfarms offer no carbon saving, and temperatures have not risen in 16 years.
There is also growing evidence we are entering a Little Ice Age.
Our own political elites in Australia and New Zealand also must be quizzed over the economics of their Carbon taxes and ETS schemes and the failing science behind them.
At least our climates are warm enough to prevent people from freezing to death in significant numbers.
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March 25, 2013 2:05pm
Monique Watson

@Dime
have never sold specifically to take CG. Have sold two properties in twelve years. The first to free up funds to complete another project and the second was an apartment in Wellington that we put on the market when the first ChCh earthquake hit. I was in hospital when we signed the conveyancing papers; I had twins a week later and the second Christchurch earthquake hit two weeks later.
There are just so many other factors to figure in in prop. invest. other than just CG.
That first property gained another 200k from 2005 to now which was a good lesson on selling or holding. I believe that you don’t lose if you hold a good quality property, unless there is a compelling business reason to sell. You always learn more to add value at a later stage on a crap property.
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March 25, 2013 2:11pm
dime

first POM is OUT!
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March 25, 2013 2:13pm
Colville

dime…Its not nice to gloat 🙂
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March 25, 2013 2:21pm
dime

not trying to gloat. more.. excited and sharing good news with tragic black cap fans 🙂
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March 25, 2013 2:32pm
Manolo

Treachery and cowardice, trademarks of the left: http://www.spectator.co.uk/features/8864541/hitch-fight/
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March 25, 2013 2:58pm
Yvette

ACC computer debacle
NOVOPAY
and now … “An EQC security breach contains details of 67,000 claimants, nearly seven times the number first realised.”

Whatever happened to Helen’s fucking KNOWLEDGE WAVE?
Did we have it already and lost it again, or was it never there to start with?
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March 25, 2013 2:59pm
Fletch

Hitler finds out that Google Reader is being shut down –

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=A25VgNZDQ08#!
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March 25, 2013 3:37pm
Pete George

It could be popcorn time again.

Last week in a satirical post Chris Trotter mentioned coups and alluded to three factions in Labour – Shearer/old guard, the Left and Roberston’s “cast of the young and the restless”.

At The Standard Eddie has expanded on this theme substantially, also mentions coups, and claims a knowledge of who voted for whom in last month’s secret ballot.

This follows perhaps Shearer’s biggest blow to Labour ambitions last week. And both Trotter and Eddie have suported replacing Shearer as Labour leader.

Of course these could all be unrelated coincidences. “Labour’s three factions” and talk of coups
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March 25, 2013 3:46pm
nickb

Great to see the English media and various biased cricinfo and TV commentators in line for a huge kick in the groin tomorrow when NZ takes down England. IMO there is no way they can hang on without Cook and Trott given the deteriorating pitch. Hopefully I haven’t jinxed them
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March 25, 2013 6:26pm
Cato

France abandons 75% tio tax bracket:

http://hotair.com/archives/2013/03/24/france-finally-abandons-that-75-percent-tax-on-the-wealthy/
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March 25, 2013 6:32pm
Manolo

The socialist Frogs deserve every calamity that comes their way. Hollande and his government are two of them.
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March 25, 2013 6:43pm
Nostalgia-NZ

nickb: according to big bruv the team got together and conspired how to get a ‘face saving’ draw out of the series, which means the BC’s will bowl underarm all day tomorrow in order to achieve that.
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March 25, 2013 6:45pm
Kea

Manolo, I agree. The cheese eating garlic breathed bicycle riding surrender monkeys have a history of supporting failed socialism. Just look at the way they reacted when the neighbouring socialist workers party came over for a wee visit ! The pricks could not break out the Cassoulet & wine fast enough.

A few capitalists came and broke up that happy meeting of the minds and they have never forgiven the English as a result.
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March 25, 2013 7:02pm
nasska

Two Irishmen Paddy and Mick are having a drink and watching the football around Mick’s house.At full time Paddy gets up to go home but notices it is pissing down with rain outside.

“Stay the night here Paddy,” says Mick.”I’ll go and make up a bed for you.”

When Mick comes back down the stairs Paddy is drenched to the bone.

Mick says,”What the fuck happened to you?”

Paddy replies,”I went home for my pyjamas.”
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March 25, 2013 8:00pm
Viking2

Three couples—one elderly, one middle-aged, one young and newly wed—apply for membership in a church. The pastor informs them that the requirement for new parishioners is that they abstain from sex for two weeks. The couples agree and go their separate ways.

After two weeks, they return. The pastor asks the elderly pair if they were able to abstain for two weeks. “No problem at all, Pastor,” replies the old man.

“Congratulations!” says the pastor. “Welcome to the church.” He turns to the middle-aged couple and asks if they were able to abstain for two weeks. “It was difficult,” replies the husband. “By the end of the second week, I had to sleep on the couch, but we did it.”

“Congratulations on overcoming temptation,” says the pastor. “Welcome to the church.” He then turns to the newlyweds and asks if they were able to abstain for two weeks.

“At first it was no problem,” says the husband. “But one day my wife was reaching for a can of corn on the top shelf, and she dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there.”

“You understand, of course, that this means you will not be welcome in our church,” says the pastor.

“We know,” says the young man. “We’re not welcome at the supermarket anymore either.”
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March 25, 2013 8:11pm
Johnboy

I think I saw that at Countdown Wainui last Saturday V2! 🙂
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March 25, 2013 8:13pm
Pete George

A cool cricket reaction pic: https://twitter.com/ESPNcricinfo/status/316062698179817472/photo/1
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March 25, 2013 8:20pm
nasska

This may be too perverted & sick for some of you! 🙂

Ref: https://www.dropbox.com/s/5knn152foxxj3e5/B%20up%20B.jpg
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March 25, 2013 8:24pm
Yvette

The television ute ad beginning “The farmer wants a wife…”
Merde! – that’s going to have to go
Along with the Australian and US edition realities shows, not to mention “Bauer sucht Frau”
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March 25, 2013 8:25pm
Kea

nasska, not even close. Try harder next time 🙂
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March 25, 2013 8:28pm
nasska

Some of our fellow commenters have lived sheltered cloistered lives Kea…..next week there’s a blow up altar boy & I’m trying to introduce the subject gradually. 🙂
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March 25, 2013 8:34pm
big bruv

Nostalgia.

I think I suggested that the teams “leadership” and NZC sat down at the start of this series and planned how they might (with a stroke of luck) come out of the series with a draw. Nothing I have seen so far in this series changes my opinion.

However, that does not mean that I as a cricket fan cannot enjoy the prospect of a win for the NZ team.

Mind you, before we get all excited it is worth remembering that it is only England that we are playing, it’s not as if they are a powerhouse of world cricket.
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March 25, 2013 8:35pm
Johnboy

A construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and put his dick…in a vice. He secured it tightly and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw. The man, terrified, screamed, “Stop! Stop! You’re not going to…to…cut it off, are you???!?”

The husband said, with a gleam of revenge in his eye, “Nope. You are. I’m going to set the garage on fire.”
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March 25, 2013 8:43pm
Johnboy

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scotsman are in a bar discussing how stupid their wives are…

The English man says: You know my wife must be the most stupid woman on this planet. There was a sale down at the supermarket last week, she bought $300 worth of meat, and we don’t even have a freezer…

The Scotsman says: That’s nothing, my wife went out last week and bought a brand new car for $40000, and she can’t even drive…

The Irishman says: You think that’s stupid, I went home last week and my wife told me that she’d booked herself a two week holiday in Tenerife. I watched her packing her case and she took nearly 400 condoms with her, and she doesn’t even have a penis…
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March 25, 2013 8:55pm
Nostalgia-NZ

I’m not excited big bruv, circumspect in fact, if we get past England for a series win.

I’m eating my words about the new coach and captain and are happy to be doing so, sharp and focused the Black Caps are. If NZ win the English will either want to come back here to avenge their defeat, or eat the loss for a very long time.
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March 25, 2013 8:56pm
big bruv

Nos

I will eat my words if we do well in England. Until then the jury is still out as far as I am concerned.
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March 25, 2013 9:02pm
Nostalgia-NZ

Fair enough.
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March 25, 2013 9:13pm
Pauleastbay

it’s not as if they are a powerhouse of world cricket.

They just beat India at home, which is like winning Lotto 6 weeks on the trot.

Ireally hope we win,and if we do, it still won’t change any thoughts I have reagrding the coach but what I would really like is to get the Poms out here fresh, we always get them tired after a big tour of India or the Windies . By the time thye get here they have been away for three months.

But a series win for NZ is rarer than rocking horse shit so we should enjoy it.
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March 25, 2013 9:41pm
Pauleastbay

A farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.
In court, the Eversweet Company’s hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy.
‘Didn’t you say to the police at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine?’asked the solicitor.
Paddy responded: ‘Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I’d just loaded my fav’rit cow, Bessie, into da… ‘
‘I didn’t ask for any details’, the solicitor interrupted. ‘Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine!’?’
Paddy said, ‘Well, I’d just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin’ down da road…. ‘
The solicitor interrupted again and said,’Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question. ‘
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Paddy’s answer and said to the solicitor: ‘I’d like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie’.
Paddy thanked the Judge and proceeded.’Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav’rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin’ her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin’ and groanin’. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.
Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin’ and groanin’ too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, ‘How are you feelin’?’

‘Now wot da fock would you say?
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March 25, 2013 9:48pm
Viking2

More time and money wasted. Not sure who is the worst, but looks like it the Nelson wanker Smith. Fotnightly meetings of officials. At the taxpayers expense of course.

Mayor fails to convince Minister to fast-track Unitary Plan

Monday, 25, Mar, 2013 7:48PM

The Auckland Council and the Government have agreed to set up a working party over the city’s Unitary Plan.

Auckland Mayor Len Brown and Housing Minister Nick Smith met to discuss the city’s housing issues at the city’s Town Hall tonight.

Mayor Brown failed to get an agreement from Dr Smith to fast-track the council’s Unitary Plan.

He had wanted the plan to come into effect this September, rather than in three years time.

The two sides will, however, be establishing a working party to deal with Auckland’s housing supply issues, which will meet on a fortnightly basis.
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March 25, 2013 10:14pm
axeman

Damn it was cold in western Europe the last few days! “Scientists consider it appropriate to call it an event of the century,”

http://notrickszone.com/2013/03/24/march-cold-records-smashed-throughout-germany-wind-chill-down-to-33c-event-of-the-century/

http://notrickszone.com/2013/03/22/berlin-freezes-in-100-year-winter-record-snow-blankets-germany-bitter-cold-grips-europe/
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March 26, 2013 12:38am
SPC

axeman, I thought last years record winter cold was the event of the century, that Arctic oscillation is certainly in its negative phase.
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March 26, 2013 1:33am
Manolo

Highway robbery EU-style: http://www.foxnews.com/world/2013/03/25/cypriot-leaders-creditors-secure-agreement-toward-bailout/
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March 26, 2013 6:15am
Manolo

V2: the incompetent Greenie Smith is infinitely more dangerous than comrade Len Clown.
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March 26, 2013 6:17am
big bruv

pauleastbay

“They just beat India at home,”

Well aware of that. My point was made with tongue firmly placed in cheek. I do so because of all the nations we play cricket against they are the ones who I love to beat the most.

When it comes to cricket the English are as arrogant as Kiwis are when it comes to rugby, even when we beat the Poms in England in 99 they could not bring themselves to admit that they had been beaten by a better side.

So, as I say, even if we do win don’t get too excited about it because it is only England.
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March 26, 2013 6:42am

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